As a parent – or as someone who aspires to parenthood – you may be interested to know that in Canada the average cost of raising a child from infancy through high school is about $182,000. If you foot the bill for another two to four years of college or university for your child, you can add at least another $40,000 to $50,000 to the sum.

The numbers represent spending within a typical middle class household. No extravagance here by Canadian standards, just spending that typically reflects the general needs and expectations of most of today’s families across the land.

Obviously, food and clothing account for much of the spending that goes to raising children. But plenty more goes to other things such as school books and activities, transportation, allowances, maybe special medical and dental needs, gifts, vacations, and – in today’s electronically driven world – computers and cell phones.

Sports and recreation factor into the picture, too, sometimes in a big way. And that’s what I’d like to focus on today.

The fact is, in most areas of spending concerning kids, there is not a lot of financial wiggle room for parents. Needs are needs after all, and beyond that it’s basically a given that a child’s lifestyle ought to proportionately reflect that of his or her parents (assuming the parents are fiscally realistic about the lifestyles they lead).

In matters of sports and recreation, there is significant wiggle room for spending. Smart parents can find ways to spend wisely – even frugally  – and at the same time keep their youngsters active, healthy, and happy.

In saying this, I’m in no way minimizing the importance of sports and recreation in the lives of children. Kids need to be active for the sake of their physical and mental health. Moreover, sports and recreation activities help kids hone the social skills they need to function well in the competitive adult world they will eventually join.

What I am saying is that there are plenty of sports and recreation options out there that vary widely in terms of costs, and that educating oneself about those costs can have a significant impact on a family’s finances over the life of the child.

Newlyweds planning families, and parents whose little ones still have a lot of growing to do, especially benefit from broadening their outlook in this regard. It starts with an understanding of spending options and standards.

Let’s consider some of those options and standards point by point, and assign a spending value to them in terms of being great, pretty good, and not so good.

Hockey – Value: Not so good.

With this assigned value I am not denigrating Canada’s national obsession in any way, I’m just saying it can be hard on the pocketbook as a serious kids’ sport. We’re talking registration costs approaching perhaps $500 a season, plus new gear costing upwards of $1,000. Then there’s the matter of travel/accommodation expenses. And because it’s a shift sport, you have to ask how much actual playing time your child will receive. Of course, if a child has a real desire to play the sport, parents may have to ante up. Tax credit and financial aid programs can help out here (see my note about them at the end of this blog).

Hockey moms and dads who are strapped ought to check out used equipment options. Note, for example, that in Toronto the civic government has partnered with Goodwill, the Greater Toronto Hockey League (GTHL) and several businesses to launch a Hockey Reuse Equipment Bank.
See http://www.goodwill.on.ca/2006_newsrelease_39.htmlfor more info.

Cycling – Value: Not so good.

In addition to the initial expense of at least $500 for a half decent, new racing bike for a wee racer, parents are looking at hundreds more in outlays for cycling shoes, helmets, and sports duds. Moreover, if your child seriously pursue the sport over time, count on spending thousands on better bikes and renewed equipment over the years. Also fees, transportation costs and time needed for the sport can be daunting. Bike races usually require entry fees of $15 to $30, then there’s the matter of transportation to racing events that can be spaced hundreds, even thousands, of kilometres apart. Many parents buy bikes for their kids anyway. To save coin, you can let the kids roll and have fun exercising freely outside of the official competition.

Riding – Value: Not so good.

As you can imagine, a sport involving horses cannot be cheap.  First, lessons are needed at usually $30 to $50 per hour. Now add a saddle, proper riding attire, and the use of a horse, which can run well over $1,000 annually. Of course, you can always buy your child a horse, but that opens another whole bin of costly oats. A horse can cost you from hundreds to thousands of dollars. Then you have to take care of the animal with boarding, grooming, feed, and medical and transportation costs (think horse trailer and a vehicle sturdy enough to pull it). You’ll probably want to consider this as a sport for your kid after you win the lottery.

Gymnastics – Value: Not so good.

Dreams of Olympic gold can quickly turn to lead when you start adding up the costs here. You wouldn’t think gymnastics would be all that expensive. But outlays for simple weekly lessons soon grow as quickly as your kid’s limbs. Suddenly, there is the need for professional private coaching that costs hundreds of dollars a month. Now add warm-up and performance attire, not to mention travel costs and registration fees. It’s easy to spend $1,000 to $5,000 a year for basic expenses, not including skills camps and Olympic circuit training.

Martial Arts – Value: Pretty Good.

Team sports are great for developing social skills. But there is a lot to be said for individual disciplines that teach kids self-reliance and discipline. Karate, Tae Kwon Do and other martial arts require simple attire and that’s it beyond the training fees, which may run parents $400 or $500 a year. Naturally, courses with celebrated masters in teaching roles can run much higher, but does your child really need to learn his or her chops from Steven Seagal?

Soccer – Value: Great.

For all the talk about hockey being Canada’s national sport, the truth is that in terms of the sheer number of kids in Canada who play the game, soccer is the sport of choice. Parents can expect to spend as little as $300 for the privilege of seeing their kids runs themselves ragged for 90 minutes a game. The gear, shorts and sweat shirts, don’t come with big price tags, and soccer balls can be had for $20 each on sale. In terms of practice, soccer can be played just about anywhere.

Swimming – Value: Great.

A great strengthening sport from the point of view of both individual skills development and team skill development.  Gear is minimal, obviously, and school swim teams frequently have either their own pools or pools under sponsorship. Practice can be had for the small price of a local community pool membership, plus there are bodies of water everywhere worth dipping into come warm sunshine. Special swimming lessons may run parents a few hundred dollars.

Basketball and Volleyball – Value: Great.

Basketball and volleyball are very popular school and community centre sports with courts and balls provided. Your expense amounts to a simple uniform and, if your child plays in a community league, maybe a small community membership fee. You may have to put a little money towards gas to drive to and from games. Practice is easy. Pick up games for either sport are easily arranged on courts at playgrounds and on school property.

Track Sports – Value: Great.

Running is perhaps the most affordable sport. We’re talking about expenses that amount to the cost of a pair of good running shoes. Schools everywhere have track and field programs that are fully sponsored. Most schools readily supply equipment for field sports such as javelin or pole vaulting. Practice can take place anywhere there is a field.

So, all this should help you decide what kind of value you’re getting for the dollars you spend on your kids’ sports activities. You will notice I left football out of the mix. That’s because it’s mostly oriented to male high school students, and my thinking here was to look at sports that apply to a broad cross section of youngsters.

The bottom line is, when spending on sports and recreation for your kids, be money smart. Spend only what you can afford to spend. If you promote affordable sports to your kids when they are young, they are likely to cotton to them.

Meanwhile, be aware that the federal government offers a tax benefit that helps parents cover costs for kids’ sports and recreation activities. Through the Canada Revenue Agency, you can, and I quote, “claim to a maximum of $500 per child the fees paid in 2011 relating to the cost of registering your or your spouse’s or common-law partner’s child in a prescribed program of physical activity.”

As well, the Province of Ontario offers something called the Ontario Children’s Activity Tax Credit covering an extensive array of sports and recreation activities. Under the program, parents and guardians are able to claim up to $500 of eligible expenses per child. There is a refundable tax credit worth up to $50 per child under 16 years of age, or up to $100 for a child with a disability under age 18.

Last but not least, financially strapped parents should take note of a charitable organization called KidSport, with chapters in all regions of Canada. KidSport provides grants ranging from $100 to $500 to cover the cost of registration fees for one season of sport. Some chapters may also assist with equipment, youth leadership opportunities, sport camps and travel costs.

‘If your children are clueless about your household finances, it’s your fault. That’s what makes a survey from the Canadian Institute of Chartered Accountants (CICA) so significant.’

To read the full article click here .

Among parents, questions abound these days about what to pay babysitters, especially if babysitting is frequently required within a household. Answers are available. There are norms providing guidelines. But before I get to them, I’d like to offer a few comments about the subject in general.

With babysitting, it’s not just a matter of getting what you pay for, it’s a matter of getting what you pay for from someone you can trust. After all, we’re talking about the safety and care of your kids here, so questions about babysitting fees are relevant only after you’ve determined to the best of your ability that your babysitter will do a good job of looking after your little ones.

Truth is, pricey services from qualified caregivers do not guarantee kids will be well looked after.

We’ve all heard the horror stories about caregivers who are closet sadists, or who are just mean-spirited. We’ve seen the news reports about monsters caught on hidden cameras. They jostle babies violently in cradles, they are petty tyrants, they are neglectful, or they are mean and irresponsible in ways that hardly reflect the upright or cheery demeanors they present when meeting and greeting the parents.

So when considering what you are willing to pay a babysitter, always initially consider the worth of the individual from the point of view of trust. This applies as much to qualified caregivers as it does to 14-year-old Jill Smith from down the street. Aside from meeting with babysitters to get to know them, check references and speak to others who are familiar with the babysitter’s behaviour and skills.

Then start thinking about babysitting dollars and cents.

So where to begin? Well, let’s start with the previously mentioned Jill Smith, since she and others her age or older are the kind of candidates most parents rely on for babysitting.

Nowadays for Jill, a general rule of thumb is that she be paid $10 an hour for babysitting. Of course, if she takes the initiative to offer her services for less, you may have yourself a deal depending on her skills and reliability. But if, after having tucked away the wee ones, your $6.00-an-hour sitter invites friends over for parties and your liquor cabinet is ransacked, you may want to rethink the worth of your savings.

In terms of qualified caregivers, hourly fees generally range from $15.00 to $20.00.  But additional fees may come into play depending on what you expect from your sitter. The extent of the caregiver’s cooking, cleaning or special care-giving responsibilities may call for a higher hourly rate. With caregivers, minimum rates also often apply. It’s not unusual for caregivers with five or more years experience to charge a little extra on fees.

Meanwhile, if your caregiver is responsible for handing more than one child, expect to pay $1.50 an hour extra for each additional child. For special duties including what I’ve touched on – as well as things like transporting kids by car, grocery shopping, laundry, what have you – expect to pay $1.00 to $2.00 an hour more over your caregiver’s basic rate.

As to what you pay Jill for the extra responsibilities you may place on her, that’s entirely negotiable. Just try to be fair.

Now, I have a few last words of advice. Fees for babysitting services ought to be part of any home budget where wee ones are running around. Even if you’ve only got one little one under your roof and you don’t expect to be getting out much without him or her in tow, you should at least put something aside for unexpected occasions when babysitting may be required.

Of course, if you’re a gregarious soul who expects to get about and about a lot, you better be darn sure you plan ahead for your babysitting needs.

Ten to $20.00 dollars or more an hour can add up fast.

A mass migration is about to occur in Canada involving well over two million citizens. Well, teenagers, actually. Call them Millennials, Echo Boomers, or Generation Y if you like. They are 13 to19-year-olds who are preparing to leave the carefree days of summer behind and march back to school.

It is a momentous occasion not only for kids, but for parents too, for we are the ones who must spring for the migrant’s provisions, which may include the likes of Converse sneakers, Diesel jeans, Mac Books, JanSport backpacks, and a seemingly endless array of other apparent necessities.

Our consumer culture calls upon us to provide for no less. Indeed, the fires of material desire are right now being stoked in the marketplace by more vaunted brand names than you can shake an iPhone at.

Makers of apparel and builders of gadgets know all too well the contradictions that drive teenagers, who are at that tender age where they wish to carve out their own identities while at the same time believing it’s possible to do so by conforming to norms of fashion.

Still, within the framework of how back-to-school spending bears on teenagers psychologically, there is some good news for parents.

Studies show that while kids want all kinds of cool stuff to ring in the school year, most realize that resources available for acquiring the goods are limited. Moreover, for all the status-conscious pressures that TV, the Internet, and peers may bring to bear at this time of year, in the end parents and family hold considerable sway with teenagers. Perhaps surprising to some, this is by the teenagers’ choice, according to research.

And there is something else to consider. Teens generally are savvy consumers. Their back-to-school funds (read mom and dad’s dough) receive a lot of scrutiny, though not always.

Take my 13-year-old daughter, for example. I’m pleased to say she reflects some of my better traits – like my habit of thinking ahead. Sometimes though, she thinks a little too far ahead, as she demonstrated with talk about back-to-school shopping somewhere around the end of July this year.

I suppose this is what happens when you combine a positive strength with TV ads, magazine articles, and pressure from teenage friends overcome by fabulous fall fashions.

Be that as it may, I reasoned with my daughter that mid summer was really not the time for back-to-school shopping talk. Mid to late August was a better time to consider the issue. Still, she persisted, with a practically exhausting plea surrounding her pressing need for a cool new backpack.

“What’s wrong with the backpack from last year?” I enquired, noting that the last time I checked, the item didn’t have so much as a scratch on it or a loose thread dangling from a seam.

“It’ so last year,” came my daughter’s response, and there I knew I was not up against a real, utilitarian need, but simply an extravagant want. She carried on.

“It’s not too expensive,” she said. But I remained unconvinced.

“If you want it so badly, then buy it yourself with your savings,” I suggested.

Needless to say, this didn’t go over well. She looked a little startled. Then her brow furrowed a little, and in that furrow I saw a glimmer of what so many have to say about youngsters these days – kids feel they simply are entitled to all the material riches that surround them.

Now, don’t get me wrong, I love my daughter dearly, but she is still a growing girl subject to all of society’s influences. Like all of us, she has to learn and come to terms with the limits that finances place upon individuals and families. I know that lessons in frugality – and a waste not, want not attitude towards life – are good for her.

In this spirit, I finally told her the current backpack was “so one more year.”

Now, in saying this I knew there would be other more qualified, even fashion-oriented, purchases to consider as the school start approached. Though I gave my daughter a flat “no” on the backpack, she and I both knew that a melodic “yes” could be in the offing for items to come, which ideally would meld the “utilitarian” with the “stylish”  (it’s hard to argue against wants if at the same time they meet needs).

From a back-to-school spending perspective, the point for parents here is to be a small “c” conservative with teenagers while at the same time staying open to some small “l” liberal kindliness toward them.

Here’s my game plan, and it’s a proven one. Before making any back-to-school purchases, scrutinize your child’s wants and needs closely. Then do a complete inventory of what your child now has, as well as other stuff that may be kicking around the house (good hand-me-downs should always be taken into consideration). Then check for savings on stuff through seasonal promotions, big box stores, the Internet and even dollar stores (especially regarding school supplies).

By promoting conservation and bargains in relation to utilitarian stuff like basic apparel and school supplies, you may open the way to savings that can be put toward back-to-school purchases that carry the most emotional weight with your child.

Let’s face it, a teenager will never try to argue about getting a new ruler unless the ruler that once was is now broken or missing. What would the argument be otherwise? “Mom, the ruler’s centimeters are so last year?”

Let it be known that you are open to give and take on back-to-school purchases, and your kids will warm to you. They’ll meet the chilly fall and winter months ahead happily, provided of course that you’ve given them some opportunity to get out in style.

Around the office, I’m known as a stern and frugal manager concerning cash outlays. If certain parties, say business suppliers, don’t have a thoroughly convincing case for why they want me to give them more money for some reason or other, I don’t hesitate to say no. Period.

So why is it that I sometimes feel like I’m turning into a guilt-ridden bowl of jelly at home when either of my two children asks me for more coin?

I know it must have something to do with the psychology of being a mom.  I love my kids. I want them to be happy, and they know how to tug at my purse strings. I want them to live well and enjoy all the best that life offers. That’s a real challenge, because it’s often the case that in kids’ eyes today the best things in life don’t come free, they come with a price tag.

Grappling with the prolonged whining, misery, and even rage that can follow from not divvying up in the face of a child’s beseeching pleas for tickets to a Taylor Swift concert can do a real number on a mom. Quite often I find my “no” turning into a “maybe” and on the odd occasion a ‘yes’.

So what’s a pushover parent to do? Well, I’ve done a little research, and I’ve found some interesting answers to that question.

For example, there are the thoughts of Cameron Huddleston, contributing editor at Kiplinger.com, who has imagined using a rather curious psychological ploy when dealing with spend-happy kids.

Huddleston notes that she once received a press release with the headline: “Is There Child Slave Labor in Your Child’s Halloween Candy?” (the press release concerned Free Trade chocolate given out by the non-profit organization Green America).

She passed the news item along to her senior editor, who joked about it saying, “Sorry, kids, no candy this year. I’m protecting other little kids like you from being forced into slave labor. I’m sure you’ll understand.”

With that, Huddleston started thinking – what if moms could use excuses of this nature whenever kids asked for more money for something? Some ideas came to her.

 “Mom, can I have a new toy? No, honey, because most toys are made in China. And Chinese toys have lead paint and other harmful chemicals that could make you really sick.”

“Mom, can I have some new clothes? No, sweetie, most clothes are made in sweatshops where people are paid very little to work long hours in terrible conditions.”

“Mom, can I go to a Hannah Montana concert? No, darling, because you’d just be lining the pockets of her parents and agent, who’ve probably taken away her childhood to turn her into a money-making machine.”

But then, in the process of removing her tongue from her cheek, Huddleston came round to thinking:  well, it’s probably all too extreme. Still, she believes  the fantasies do point out something of substance concerning the “no” factor and kids. A mom has to explain why she is saying no, and she has to do so in terms her child can understand. 

Says Huddleston: “The slave labor excuse might resonate with a 10-year-old, but it won’t work on a four-year-old. You’ll just get a blank stare then more pleading. That’s why your response has to be age appropriate – and simple.”

This is where Huddleston praised Money Smart Kids columnist Janet Bodnar’s money lessons by age group. Based on Bodnar’s advice, Huddleston arrives at some serious conclusions of her own about saying no to kids. In a nutshell – though I paraphrase and elaborate – they are:

•  With wee ones, set and explain limits well before there’s the chance for an in-store meltdown over, say, that plastic troll with the streaked hair. Be absolutely clear ahead of time that there are serious consequences to being disobeyed.   If there is a store meltdown, so be it, stick to your guns.  Chances are it will be the only one if your child does not get their way. On the contrary, if you give in be prepared for a plethora of future meltdowns.

•  For older kids, it’s a matter of reminding them of their responsibilities, particularly in relation to the support you already give them, like the allowance you dole out regularly. Rather than say no to a request, say yes, but add that they’ll have to use their own money, or at least some of it. Perhaps a loan is in order against future allowances? When they realize they have to pony up themselves, they start backing off.

• For still older children, you might cave a little but at the same time get your kids to chip in for things they want, which teaches them good lessons about making smart spending choices.  Also, as your kids mature, try  changing the game altogether by encouraging them to think about others. For example, when they ask for new clothes, urge them to check their clothing inventory to make donations to others in need. It shifts their thinking from being acquisitive to being socially responsible.

Now, Huddleston’s recommendations all seem pretty reasonably to me. But I ask myself, what if my now socially responsible child absolutely needs new garb for a socially responsible event, even though her bedroom closet is plum full of stuff perfectly suited to socially responsible events? Well, I think it’s probably then that I should start managing my household as I run my business.

No, I hear myself saying. Period.

What about them Bruins, eh? When my nephew first started playing little league hockey his team was called the Canucks. It was all very cute and miniature but there was a kid on his team whom I freaking hated with a fiery passion. Let’s call him number twenty two because that was his number.

At four years old number twenty two was already playing dirty, refusing to pass the puck and engaging in rather long and exaggerated celebrations when he scored a goal, which was often. Whatever went down on the ice you could bet your medium double double that number twenty two was in the middle of it.

Of course his parents would be sitting in the stands trying to hide their smirks, thinking he was on the fast track to the NHL instead of noting that their child required some additional lessons on manners, team work, humility and respect. By the end of the season I couldn’t stop myself from heckling twenty two so I had to sit in the bar and watch from behind the glass.

Of course my nephew is on the fast track to the NHL also and since the little league has shown that I cannot be a passive bystander I do hope that the NHL bans headshots of all descriptions so I don’t end up jumping on the ice and beating anyone who so much as looks at my nephew’s head with their own stick! But moving on…

We all have our own future NHL’ers or future National Ballet principal’s in our lives and may they all live the lives they dream of but let’s get serious for a minute and talk plan B, saving for an education!

Most people save for their kids’ education with a Registered Education Savings Plan (RESP). These accounts can be opened by parents, friends or family members. The biggest attraction of an RESP for most people is the Canada Education Savings Grant (CESG). Through this grant the Federal Government will deposit a percentage of contributions to the plan but you must apply. For more information on the grant and how to apply visit: http://www.hrsdc.gc.ca/eng/learning/education_savings/public/cesg.shtml.  

RESP basics:

• There is no annual contribution limit but there is a lifetime contribution limit of $50,000.
• More than one child can be named to a plan.
• Contributions are not tax deductible.
• ***Make sure to read the terms and conditions of the plan you choose***

Not everyone can contribute regularly to an RESP which is absolutely fine, don’t beat yourself up about it. Keep in mind that it’s perfectly politically correct to remind friends and family members at birthdays and holidays that your child has an RESP when they inquire about gift wish lists.

Alas, some of you will have been right all along and your child will make it to the National Ballet or the National Hockey League. And what then of the RESP?! The funds can be designated to another (qualifying) beneficiary or if there is no other beneficiary then the funds can be returned to the subscriber but don’t think you get to keep the CESG!

For more information on RESP’s:
http://www.fcac-acfc.gc.ca/eng/resources/publications/savInvest/PDFs/TSResp-eng.pdf

Consider a teenager who for the sake of today’s discussion I will call her Kayla. She is 14 years old, and she is a living, breathing example of a savvy money manager. In fact, she started demonstrating personal money management skills at age three.

Does that make her a child prodigy like Pablo Picasso, who painted his first “realistic” masterpiece at age 12, or Wolfgang Mozart, who began writing musical compositions at age five? Well, no, Kayla is not unusually gifted; she’s just a normal kid with an average I.Q. But she does boast one important advantage – a couple of great financial tutors.

From the time she was a toddler, Kayla’s mom and dad made a point of teaching their daughter about money. It wasn’t hard to do. All it required was a little time and a little patience – no more than what might be required to teach a child how to dress and behave for any given social occasion.

Actually, her parents’ influence makes for an interesting personal history. So let’s explore Kayla’s formative years with a run down of how she came by her financial smarts.

Kayla between the ages of three to six.

Starting at age three, Kayla joined mom and dad in a game called “Let’s Pretend to Buy Stuff.”  She got a sense for the game pieces – including pennies, nickels, dimes, quarters, loonies, toonies and bills in the order of their value – and she was challenged to keep the game pieces in a safe place. Soon, the game was extended beyond the household to the local store, where Kayla learned she could really buy stuff, especially licorice and root beer.   This turned out to be an amazingly fun way for Kayla to begin to learn the basics.

By six, Kayla had plenty of experience in the game. She had a sense of what each coin was worth, and a notion that bills were worth a whole lot more. She often matched the coins in her pocket with the prices of licorice, root beer and other modest treats and items, and she came to recognize that she had to make certain choices because the coins could only buy so much at the candy counter.

Quite naturally, she got around to enquiring about where money comes from. “Daddy and mommy have to work for it,” she was told, and she realized the coins didn’t simply materialize out of thin air. That was about the time she started receiving a small weekly allowance that she took with her to her grade one class. At the same time, her parents encouraged her to start making lists of things she could buy with her allowance.

Kayla between the ages of seven to 10.

The game continued apace. Kayla understood it was no longer just pretend. It was, as her parents explained, “the game of life” with new rules, including the opening of a personal bank account for Kayla. It was a thrilling moment, since mom and dad took her to the bank to go through a process that gave Kayla a hint of the powers grown-ups enjoy.

Kayla became adept at counting coins and knowing their equivalent value. Moreover, mom and dad encouraged her to save for “big ticket” items like toys, specifically her growing collection of trolls with multi-coloured hair. By now, not only was she saving small amounts in her “Miss Piggy” bank, she was socking away in the bank all the larger amounts that came her way. For instance, those green tinted bills with the Queen’s face on them that Uncle Jack gave her at Christmas – an astronomical sum by Kayla’s estimate.

Kayla’s parents were attentive to her small triumphs. Congratulations were always in order when she made proper change, matched appropriate amounts with things to buy, and achieved enough savings to purchase a special item. Of course, like all little kids, Kayla made her share of mistakes, spending frivolously. But mom and dad were always careful to discuss the slip-ups in an understanding way.

Financial smarts came in leaps and bounds as Kayla approached the age of 10. She established a weekly spending diary and a monthly savings plan that soon developed into a six-month plan for major projects that included a “Beyonce” backpack and a custom rack for her bicycle. With her parents’ encouragement, she also started to think creatively about ways to earn extra money for special purposes.

Just like mom, she took to comparing prices while shopping, and she started cooperating with family efforts to save money on water, gas, food etc. She even got a feel for cheques and debit cards, her parents guiding her every step of the way.

Kayla between the ages of 11 to 14.

Kayla felt like she entered the big time come her eleventh birthday. She knew it from the moment Uncle Jack gave her an orange bill with a Canadian Prime Minister on it rather than one of those bills showing Queen Elizabeth. It went straight to the bank. She began calculating the cost of items with sales tax included. And she discovered she could borrow money from her parents for important purchases provided the loan was reasonable and would be paid back in full and on time.

Very importantly as she eased into her teens, she received lessons from mom and dad about how peer pressure can influence spending, and was encouraged to be a leader rather than a follower in matters of personal style. She got into the habit of shopping with mom for unique, economically priced clothes and items at vintage and thrift stores, soon discovering that a creative, “go-your-own-way” approach brought admiration – and even a little envy – from others.  The value and durability of goods also entered her vocabulary. Of course, she wasn’t entirely immune to peer pressure, the proof of it being that new pair of expensive Guess jeans she just had to have.

As time went on, many other financial terms and concepts entered her orbit.  “Fixed” as opposed to “flexible” expenses; the principle of compound interest; advertising techniques; investments and the notion of wise investing. The list goes on. She also grew confident in asking sales people detailed questions about purchases, always aware of her dad’s entreaty to “let the buyer beware.” 

Kayla now.

Today, I’d venture to say that Kayla is a very money-smart kid, with great prospects for managing her life well. She now follows a monthly and annual budget, and has established a strict regimen for saving and investing. In fact, this year, with her parents’ help, she took out her first GIC.  By the looks of things, lessons in commercial credit and debt are not far off, though it will be quite  a few years before she sees her name on a credit card, according to mom and dad.

All told, Kayla is maturing wonderfully in the game of life. Indeed, along with some schoolmates this summer, she’ll be the owner-operator of a mobile pet care service in her neighbourhood. The service highlights fresh-scented shampoos for dogs, cats, gerbils, guinea pigs or any other furry, domesticated mammal imaginable – with a percentage of proceeds going to charity. That was mom and dad’s idea, too.

So I have to affirm that, as Kayla’s example well demonstrates, personal financial smarts are not inherited, they are taught. You don’t need an I.Q. of 150 to manage and grow a budget. You just need the right mentoring and attention to the subject.

Of course, an uncle who doles out orange bills at Christmas comes in handy, too.

Friend to the frugal, foe to the spendthrift – these are among my traits as Executive Director at Credit Canada. So it might surprise you when I say that one of the keys to managing debt wisely is to spend money on pleasures every now and then even when you don’t have a lot of coin on hand.

I don’t mean spend thoughtlessly or recklessly. I’m talking about quality spending. The kind that helps you feed your spirit without breaking the bank.

Truth is, when you’re low on dough and living like a monk, it’s easy to fall into a downward spiral emotionally. And that’s not advisable. As a matter of fact, psychologists tell us that people who deny themselves too much in life eventually must deal with powerful unconscious compulsions to do exactly the opposite. It’s what we human beings do to balance things out within ourselves. Eventually, the hermit feels compelled to exit the cave and fly to Las Vegas where he drops a bundle. After the extravagance, he returns to his grotto where he beats himself up for his behavior. Then the cycle repeats itself.

So, pace yourself. Insofar as you are able without feeling financial pain, feed your spirit every once in a while with a little spending. In fact, feed yourself literally with a little spending by enjoying one of the finest, simple pleasures in life – dining out.

Going out for dinner offers good emotional returns – not to mention sensory ones if the food’s tasty – because it’s an experience that lends itself to close company and warm conversation, which are always uplifting. And here’s the beauty part: in places like Toronto, you can eat out and be bowled over by both the cuisine and the cost of it – under $15 per person for a terrific meal (not including alcohol).

I have a few favorites myself.  One way to enjoy a meal and to do it on the cheap is to consider dining out for breakfast.   In my neighbourhood there is the perfect diner that offers breakfast specials for a bargain.   The beauty of it is you feel like you have treated yourself and can do so for a mere $7 including tip.  To me that is a bargain I can enjoy completely guilt free. 

Another local restaurant offers lunch and dinner fare at a price that cannot be beat.  My daughter and I recently dined there and much to our delight were pleasantly surprised to find items on the menu that we both could thoroughly enjoy. The dinner was awesome and for under $25 including tip we were both happily filled and content.

As Canada’s premier ethnic melting pot, Toronto boasts a fabulous array of inexpensive eateries and restaurants catering to every taste imaginable. But why take my word for it? Get your search engine up and running online and check out cheap, good eats in the city – or wherever you find yourself.

Bon appétit.

One day on a crowded bus I overheard one woman talking to another about how she was indulging her children.  The conversation went on about how this woman was giving into her children’s every whim from exclusive (read expensive) summer camps, to laptops, to cell phones, to bedroom makeovers etc.

I couldn’t believe my ears. This woman must have won the lottery or perhaps she was using her credit cards to give into her children’s every request.

My bet is the latter after all she was on the same crowded bus I was, early in the morning most likely headed off to her 9 to 5 job as well.

In my head, I wanted to tell her that if she is spoiling her kids now they will not cope well on their own later.  I wanted to tell her we hear all kinds of stories of over spending at Credit Canada and we can help you now before things really go awry.

Finally, I got to the subway.  There was a problem on the subway line and the train was packed. This seems to happen far too often.  Surprisingly, it didn’t bother me one bit that I had to stand all the way to my stop. I even think I looked happy and smiling as I recalled the conversation I overheard on the bus and thought of another indulgent mother, my friend Linda.

Linda holds two jobs just so she can pay for things like her first grandson’s big birthday party, her daughter’s lavish 18th birthday, buy expensive gifts for her family on special occasions and buy expensive designer clothes for her adult children and grandchildren from across the border every other month.  She even gave her adult daughter a credit card and her daughter works!  You see she can’t say ‘no’ to her family and she is afraid to see them unhappy. But do my friends and I dare tell her she’s crazy or offer her any advice? Heck, no, or she’ll chop our heads off..

This is what Linda does: after coming home from her day job, she’ll wait for an hour and off she goes to her part time job (15 minutes away from her apartment) and works for another five hours. She uses her vacation days to work for eight hours at her part time job. She works on weekends too, only saving a day for herself. What an extravagant workaholic!  Unfortunately, she is on a vicious treadmill to provide luxuries for her family that she really cannot afford.

Now why do some parents do these kinds of things? Is it because of love, guilt, stupidity or just a plain lack of financial literacy? I’d say likely it’s all of the above.  To those facing this problem, I say think carefully about what you are doing. Often the best thing you can give a family member is your time and love and that’s good money management because it’s free!

Being a student at one of Toronto’s finest Universities, I find myself very broke. I also find myself spending more time there then at home. I also don’t have the same class hours each day. Some days I start very early and I’m home mid afternoon. Other days I start in the afternoon and I’m home very late. This leads to a major problem. Being able to eat properly throughout the day without spending the little money I have on the plethora of “restaurants” in downtown Toronto.

I remember when fast food used to be cheap. Not just in food quality but in price as well. It’s hard to resist that hunger pang in between classes when you can throw a rock and hit a sub shop, a coffee shop, a pizza place, or even a mall food court.

 These days any type of meal deal usually ends up costing $7 – $13. If I have a 10 hour day at school (classes + using school equipment/labs) that could mean I’m spending $26 that day on food. That’s a lot for a part-time employee who goes to school full time.

So what is a broke, hungry, student to do? Make 2 ham sandwiches. That easy. Sort of. Depending on the day, I have to change my eating habits. I have to change what meals I have at home, and what I bring with me on the road. Now, the days I start really early, I admit, my breakfast is a large double-double and a muffin. Yes, not what our Canadian Olympians likely eat, but I’m cool with not having a gold medal. On the days I begin later, I have a good hearty breakfast, around 9am – 10 am and pack 2 ham sandwiches for the rest of the day. When the inevitable hunger pang hits as all my classmates surround me with their purchased fast food, I whip out my ham sandwich and I’m good.

What that amounts too at the end of the week, is a good $30 still in my account that I can now throw at my credit card which is filled with text book costs. Now is my ham sandwich as appetizing as a foot long chicken and bacon ranch sub? Hell no! However, when the cost of that ham sandwich comes out of my grocery money and not the flaming hole in my wallet, it’s still less  appetizing but much more appealing than throwing down $13 for a sub/chips/pop and feeling lazy and wasteful.